Many of us are taught explicitly or implicitly that putting others first is a sign of strength, goodness, or selflessness. And to some extent, it is. Caring deeply, being reliable, offering support these are all meaningful and valuable parts of being in relationship with others.

But what happens when this becomes a pattern that leaves no room for ourselves?

When we consistently prioritise other people’s needs, feelings, and expectations above our own, something quiet but significant can begin to happen: we lose touch with what we need, what we feel, and who we are.

If you’ve ever wondered why your therapist sticks firmly to things like session time, cancellations, or appointment frequency, you’re not alone. At first glance, these boundaries might seem inflexible or even impersonal, especially in a space that’s meant to feel open, warm, and human.

But here’s the thing: the boundaries in therapy are part of the therapy. They’re not rules for the sake of control — they’re the invisible frame that holds the work safely.

In my work as a psychotherapeutic counsellor—and as someone who also navigates the world as a musician—I’ve come to recognise some of the distinct needs creatives bring into the therapy room. This post explores how we, as therapists, can better hold space for those whose identities are entwined with creativity.

Being highly sensitive isn’t a flaw. It’s not a diagnosis. It’s simply a way of being — one where your nervous system is finely tuned, where you pick up on subtleties others might miss, and where your emotional depth runs deep.

That familiar feeling many of us face, no matter our skill level. The stress of wanting to deliver a flawless performance can trigger feelings of nervousness, self-doubt, and even physical reactions like shaking or feeling sick. Often we can consciously and logically know we have the skills, or practice level to go out there and play perfectly, but unconsciously, something happens deep in our psyche that plays havoc with our physical self.

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